I never realised that purpose had purpose. Let me explain. A short while ago I was asked to vacate the flat I was renting. The reason was that my rent payments were increasingly delayed due to the erratic nature of my income. I could be flat broke on the due date and then get enough orders and sales the next week to cover the cost.
Sadly my vision and my dream were not their concern and really I was probably asking too much even for the brief period that my payments were delayed. So in the midst of all this drama I had to move back home and to make a long story short my parents are not amused. They have every right to point out the recklessness of my decision to leave a steady paying job in this economy but be that as it may I would go back and do it all over again in the exact same sequence.
Why? Because Dazzle is what I was made to do, so firmly was I made to do it that I can do it on happy days, sad days, sick days, well days, rich days, broke days and even hangover days. I find myself mentally designing even until I fall asleep sometimes and my work has allowed me to adorn some of the most amazing souls out there and celebrate their smile when they so proudly wear their accessories.
I was lost when I wasn’t following my purpose
Remember when I spoke about having a chat with Thembe Khumalo and how she was able to unmask the biggest obstacle to my success in practically five seconds. The other day I reflected back on the years in which I made my worst mistakes and realised that those were also the years that I spent my time chasing after love to fill the void of shame that kept me from following my dream.
It was as though I had made a silent resolve to tick the marriage and kids box and then I’d finally have permission to build my business. This has been and is still pretty much the going opinion at home, that I’m wasting my life and passing child rearing age for the sake of beads. Fortunately I’m at that point of respectfully agreeing to disagree because the Bible is very clear on how we are to respect and honour our parents.
I got a very unexpected call at the weekend from a guy I used to date in the shame days. He consistently pointed out how pathetic I was and needless to say it didn’t end well. I always had free time those days to blue tick and reply messages instantly, to drop whatever it was that I was doing just to catch even a five-minute glimpse at this hunk, he certainly was something.
I would drive almost to the ends of the earth just to spend time with him and he treated me like a groupie certainly because I was one. Another long story short he was calling because he had heard I wasn’t so pathetic anymore and because I am on a higher standard of self worth I didn’t drop everything I was doing to entertain this call or call back when his airtime evidently ran out.
I had better things to do like running my business and then it hit me the purpose of my purpose is to keep me out of the clutches of inadequacy. My purpose’s purpose is to give me that abundance that life has to offer while impacting the lives of other purposed beings around me.
Don’t get me wrong I forgave Mr Hunk for his not knowing what he did but I also learnt to treat myself with the fierce love and care that God has for me and that love doesn’t allow me to lower my standards or write off my dignity for a man. That love doesn’t allow another person to come and tell me how Dazzle is a waste of time or how many odds are stacked against me because God handles my affairs and He made me fully equipped to be the beacon of light I know I am.
Entrepreneurship days at Kyle
I was fortunate to attend private schools and at one such preparatory school there were frequent entrepreneurship days where the students and their parents had an opportunity to set up stalls and sell their wares for a day. This was always my most favourite day of the year and I would go by every stall and amazedly take in all that I could.
One year I thought it would be great to try and set up a stall but sadly my parents never rolled like that, so I made a whole lot of popcorn which I ate alone because my popcorn stall dreams went down the drain very fast. My parents thought they were giving me the best education to be a great employee one day I don’t think the prospect ever hit them that I could be a great employer one day.
Flowers Food & Fancy Things: The first of many Dazzle ventures
I’ve come a long way from that pitiful first attempt at Kyle and now I am hosting my own entrepreneurship day of sorts introducing my jewellery brand to the market at an event I have conceptualised and created with help from the faith that my gracious landlords have extended to me at Golden Stairs Nursery. I’ve seen resources miraculously come together for this event because Lord knows I didn’t have a cent to make this happen on my own.
My prayer for this week is that God may give you eyes to catch a glimpse of the purpose he has for you and give you peace to fight your part of the battle. Amen
