Our first instinct when relationships are failing or when people we love are leaving, is to hold on; and to hold on tightly. To be alone is something that haunts many people and makes them afraid.
But what we must remember is that not everything is meant to last forever. Not all friendships and relationships will last through every season. There is a time for everything. Therefore, we must be discerning so that we can see when it is time hold on and when it is time to let go.
There is a Time for Everything
There is a time for every purpose under heaven. (Ecclesiastes 3:1) These are the wise words that open chapter three in Ecclesiastes. It is such a simple verse but it is full of truth. There truly is a time for everything under heaven but sometimes we forget this. We think that things should last forever, and if not forever, then for as long as we live. This tends to be the case when it comes to relationships.
We meet people who make such a huge impact on our lives, who we really connect with; people we believe will be our friends for life. Sometimes that is the case, other times it’s not. Some people only come into your life for a particular season and for a particular reason. Maybe you were struggling with faith and someone prayerful came along and helped build you up? Maybe you were someone given to anxiety and someone came and taught you peace? It could be anything. But just because someone steps into your life, doesn’t mean that they have to stay there forever. Once they have helped you along, it’s time for them to leave.
But unfortunately, we don’t always understand or accept this. So then we become desperate; afraid to be alone. We end up trying to force people to stay. We become clingy and needy. But we shouldn’t ever be in a situation where we feel that we cannot survive without a particular person. Why? Because people aren’t our everything, God is.
God is Your Everything
Only God is our everything. He is our King and Father, our faithful and best friend. (Psalm 103:13, John 15:15) He is our strength and refuge, our salvation and rock. (Psalm 46:1-3, Psalm 62:1-2) He is the only one we truly cannot live without.
We must always remember to look to the Creator and not the created for our solace. We must remember that it is God who leads people to us when we need them most. And sometimes it is God telling you it is time to move on and let them go.
Another thing to remember that in every situation God is always speaking. We must listen to what He is saying, especially when it comes to relationships.
What is God Saying?
Sometimes we are separated from people because it is no longer right to be associated with them. In Corinthians we are cautioned not to be unequally yoked (2 Corinthians 6:14-16). Sometimes the people we are trying to keep beside us are people who are not good for us anymore. But you will only realise this if you listen to God when He speaks to your heart. Hear what He is saying. Listen to what He is telling you and then you will have the strength and wisdom to let go.
Lean On God
It is not always easy to do the right thing but it is always the best thing. Sometimes the right thing will mean walking away and letting go of people who have been with you for a long time. That is okay. Always remember that at the end of the day there is a time for everything; there is a season. The only one who lasts forever is God. (Psalm 48:14) You will never be alone as long as you keep yourself in His love. (Jude 1:21)
So to any of you who have been filled with fear and sorrow at the thought of letting go, know that it is alright. You will be alright. Take time to read the verses below as you step out in faith to do what you need to do. Lean on God’s love and goodness. Remember that only He will be with you always; whatever the time, whatever the season.
To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born,
And a time to die;
A time to plant,
And a time to pluck what is planted;
A time to kill,
And a time to heal;
A time to break down,
And a time to build up;
A time to weep,
And a time to laugh;
A time to mourn,
And a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones,
And a time to gather stones;
A time to embrace,
And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to gain,
And a time to lose;
A time to keep,
And a time to throw away;
A time to tear,
And a time to sew;
A time to keep silence,
And a time to speak;
A time to love,
And a time to hate;
A time of war,
And a time of peace.
– Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (NKJV)
