I had the pleasure of attending a conference themed “The Father’s Heart” at River of Life this past week. It was led by a team from Bethel Church and we got to hear some deep testimonies and really powerful words of encouragement in a new way than I was accustomed. I believe these guys wore their true selves to the conference. It was so refreshing to see real people whose lives had really been touched by The Father.
By true selves I mean they were still the same bottles exposed to contents of the world but the difference was that they had been saved by the substance of God. They weren’t safe behind the pride and arrogance of doing everything right. They were saved from the delusion(that we unfortunately suffer from) that they could get right with God by projecting an image of holiness and ticking all the right boxes.
They poured out their hearts and their tears too about their personal experiences with the Father. By the time I walked out of that conference I knew that there was another dimension of intimacy with God that I would get to unpack. It was very much like getting to the end of Black Panther and getting a sneak preview of the even more enticing sequel. (I still haven’t watched it by the way, I’m one of those who waits for the hype to end so I can watch it unadulterated LOL).
I wanted to know this Father and commune with Him on the level that these guys obviously did. Don’t get me wrong I didn’t feel inadequate or anything like that but my spirit leaped in recognition of the overflow of His love and grace towards us. We are all connected by His love regardless of colour or creed and I wish we would stop setting cultural boundaries that keep us apart.
A whole new chapter of my walk has been revealed to me and it’s so exciting to know that there is more. I’ve realised as a Christian who is African, we are never going to escape the fact that our revelation/enlightenment about God is closely tied to our colonisation as a people. Yes Independence Day is around the corner and yes we have endured many trials at the hands of our colonisers but that is not the point I’m trying to make.
I’m just pointing out that a poisoned perspective hinders our spiritual growth and is the reason why we fall so easily for the religious drama perpetuated by false prophets. You see, we’re so caught up in the history of how we came to know about God that we have overlooked the actual knowing of Him and we secretly practise our cultural rituals just in case He turns out to be for the white people and our ancestors punish us with bad luck (munyama) for our disloyalty.
A lot of us have a superficial understanding of what it means to be in relationship with God and that is how we keep falling back into the same patterns of Pharisee vibes (in other words we measure our own relationship based on how much better we appear to be doing than so and so).
An even larger chunk of us “gave” Him our lives for the sake of our Catholic/Anglican/Methodist parents because we grew up knowing it’s what we were supposed to do. What if I told you that it’s not about how you met Him. What if I told you it’s not even about what you used to do. What if I told you that He has been waiting for you all along?
He has not been waiting agitated as your boss would if you were heading a project but failing to show up on time for presentations to major clients. He isn’t drumming his fingers on the wooden desk where your file is kept. Frowning at all the trouble you’ve caused Him because He’s been called again to your hearing and the accuser is on page ten of how you’ve been falling into bed with everyone. Flirting with every other ideology of spirituality or just plain dirtying up your life with unbelief.
God has been waiting patiently, renewing your breath daily and allowing your brothers and sisters to share their testimonies with you to remind you that home is an option. That He would be there gladly waiting to welcome you the second you decided to come back.
He has never stopped waiting but we have stopped believing in His love for us. Just like our flawed parents we imagine Him ready to take His bad day out on us nezishamhu (spanking rod) just because we coincidentally misbehaved that day as well. We imagine Him as a fat politician counting crisp notes over our heads having sold us to China so he can buy His small house a Range Rover.
How could we ever trust someone whose image is so warped in our minds? How could we ever truly give ourselves to Him in spirit and in truth when we fear Him with an all too different kind of fear than the one He intends for our good.
My Independence Day prayer is that we would be set free from the shackles of our beliefs Amen.
